Super Retard

I feel like the biggest super retard.

Me and auditions are about as good as blue cordial on toast. A soggy piece of shit.

I had one today for a kids theatre show. I've done them before, I know the writer, the other actor and the director has seen me in three other productions - it all should've been all so easy.

But it wasn't, I fucked it. How? I don't even know. I was just shit.

I think it's because I've never really had to audition for too much, and now I don't really know how to. I've been lucky, most work I've gotten has been thrown my way through past shows and friends recommendations. The idea of having to sell myself while I trying to remember lines and pretend I'm talking to a 5 year old when a middle aged man is looking at me holding sock puppets turns me into a super retard.

Today things just didn't go to plan. And it's my own stupid fault.